Happy Monday kittens! I just came out of a five day long flu marathon... it was intense to say the least. There was a lot of crying, coughing and resting involved but I'm finally starting to feel like myself again. I'm still a tad bit weak though. I haven't been sick like that in years! It was a bit of a shocker. The good news is I lost a few more pounds.... lol! Isn't that horrible! The only good thing about getting sick is shedding a few. That's fine by me though..... all in all I've lost a total of 14 lbs since last October. That's right! It's been a long and very slow process and at times I've felt like giving up because I wasn't seeing any results but I've managed to make more changes in my diet and I'm starting to see results again. Whew!
My clothes are fitting so much better on me and I finally feel like I'm in control of my life again. This whole last year has been full of changes and I'm not stopping at 14lbs. I'd love to get back down to where I was before I got ill which I think slowly started in 2011. I recently re-read my old journals (which were so sad) and it appears that I haven't been this weight since 2012! I know, I know.... it's not all about the weight. It really isn't.... but I'm actually eating healthier and way less and am working out on the reg. I even stopped drinking almost all together and that's probably what was preventing me from losing even more weight. I don't don't need to be drinking all that much anyhow because I'm pretty much a ball of anxiety. I showed the Mister my old journals and he frowned and gave me a hug and agreed that these old journals should be sacrificed to the fire Gods and we should go out together and purchase a new journal for me for all my new and good memories that we will have and make together. I have no problem with burning these guys.... half the pages are already ripped out either out of shame or embarrassment. It might be a nice "therapeutic" way to help me let go of the past and start to move forward in my life. Those last three years or so were so hard.... I still can't believe I went through all of that.
Besides losing more weight and getting back into shape physically and mentally I've also been dealing and struggling with family issues (which I'm not ready to talk in depth about just yet). I've literally had to separate myself and sever almost all communication from certain members of my family in order for me to continue on with my life and my goals. It's been really hard emotionally but I feel it's the only way that I can focus on myself and achieve everything that I've been wanting to without getting dragged down. It may seem selfish but believe me I have my reasons. I'm actually doing good right now and I don't want anyone else's drama to throw me off track. There are other reasoning's too but I'll have to put it on the "back burner" for now.
I've also decided to end friendships that I felt weren't worth my time and effort any longer as well. Some of the friendships were already "floundering" and "fading". There were some that were just flat outright "toxic" and I just needed to get the hell out of the relationship. I kept my very closest friends that are near and dear to me... the ones that actually understand me and know what I've been going through. They are the only ones that I value in the end.... I'm slowly learning whom my real friends are as I grow older. I'm also learning that you don't need more than a "handful" of people to share your time with as well. It's all about quality vs. quantity.
Let's put all that "New Year, New Me" bullshit on pause for a minute and talk about this outfit.... I'm obsessed with plaid right now! I'm wishing that I had purchased this top as size smaller than I did however, since I'm shrinking little by little everyday now. Ha! This huge, chunky pearl necklace and matching earrings were an impulse buy while I was at Target the other day. I couldn't help myself.... This was the outfit that I was going to wear at Matt's Holiday Work party but I ended up with a dark green, backless top and a different black skirt. I have so many black skirts now... it's too funny. Slowly, my style has been changing over the course of this last year and I've ended up with tons of black items in my closet. Which is cool with me... you can never go wrong with black. The purse was an impulse buy as well from Target. I needed a dressy black bag and this one just "jumped out at me". As you can see my roots are starting to show.... my hair is actually a dark, cool brown color naturally. I was contemplating having a stylist try to match my color to my roots and just go darker. My hair would still be sorta ombre'ish at the bottom. I don't know what to do.... I love the red but I'm getting sick of trying to maintain it. It doesn't cost a bunch because I do it myself but sometimes I just don't want to have to worry about my dang roots showing. The woes of hair coloring..... lol! What do you all think?
Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and have a fabulous and safe New Year. I'm hoping that I'm completely over this flu thing by the 31st so I can "live it up" with The Mister and my BFF at The Alamo Draft House Sing Along for NYE! Later my darlings....
xoxo
Shirt: Forever 21
Skirt: Thrifted
Tights: Target
Shoes: Thrifted
Purse: Target
Accessories: Target
